Wednesday, 23 September 2020

Funny kittens

 


It's done!
All 1,000 pieces present and correct. Nice picture, eh?
Next:

Van Gogh "Starry night". 1,000 pieces again. I'll get back to you in a few weeks!


Monday, 21 September 2020

Cornish fauna

 Cornish wildlife is super interesting. Weird and wonderful. Take this guy:

Yes, please take  him; he's weird and scary. He can be seen roaming the fields and moors and I run away when I see his hunting party coming. He is called the giant....no, I'm kidding; he's actually a tardigrade and can be found well, everywhere - volcanic mud (not so much of that in Cornwall though), in the deep sea and rainforest (ditto) and on mountaintops (again not so much down my street). He's about 0.5mm long so not so scary - except to other tardigrades.

Here's another scary guy:
Look at those eyes! Following you, ready to pounce. I wouldn't like to be on my own with him in a room. He'd probably tickle me to death. For those who care enough, he is a Lackey Moth Caterpillar.

This is a porbeagle. At least, it's snout. Or rather the rostral cartilages. See, you can learn new words by reading this nonsense. A porbeagle is a species of mackerel shark. I guess you could cook it and eat it in a sandwich. Brown bread please. Which you couldn't say of a tardigrade. Inhabits Cornish coastal waters.

You didn't think you'd see a moose in Cornwall? You certainly will - in Cornwall, Ontario. Along with
and
That's a rat snake, by the way. So far in Cornwall, Canada but not my Cornwall. Thank goodness.

If you're planning on a visit to my neck of the woods any time soon, keep an eye out for the wildlife!

Saturday, 19 September 2020

It's that day

Shiver me timbers! Ahoy there, me hearties. It's International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

So let's here it from all you bilge-sucking pirates out there. All hands on deck. How to talk: throaty growl, West Country accent, lots of waving your cutlass. Give us yer spoils or you'll be shark bait.
Photo by Rowan Heuvel on Unsplash
Don't be lazy, resting on yer laurels
Photo by Sergey Semin on Unsplash
What's that, you're struggling with yer peg leg? It's a walk along the plank for you, yer son of a biscuit eater.
Photo by Luis Rivera on Unsplash
OK it's off to the briny deep for me, flying the Jolly Roger
Photo by David Dibert on Unsplash
and looking for some booty.
Pieces of eight, pieces of eight!
Photo by Christopher Alvarenga on Unsplash

Friday, 18 September 2020

@diaristpepys turns 100

In an idle moment I began wondering about historical figures and how they would use the Internet if alive today. It seemed a suitable subject for my 100th blog post.

Exhibit A: Samuel Pepys

  • Pepys would definitely have a Facebook page; he wanted to be a member of the establishment and this would be his way of publicising his activities and making Friends
  • LinkedIn - Pepys' LinkedIn page says "Naval Administrator has contacts and contracts for negotiation"
  • Tinder - a must for Pepys' social activity
  • WhatsApp contacts include Oliver Cromwell, Charles I, Charles II and James II.
Exhibit B: Jane Austen
  • Jane would obviously have been a blogger: bloggerjane.blogspot.com
  • Selling her novels through Amazon Kindle. Book 1 free, book 2 £2.99, book 3 £7.99, now you're hooked it's £14.99 from now on
  • Jane's LinkedIn page says "superior librettist seeking comic opera composer for collaboration"
  • She set up a WhatsApp group with her sister, brothers and assorted Hampshire country folk
Exhibit C: Leonardo Da Vinci
  • Leo started with Instagram, obviously. A new picture every day
  • YouTube channel of Leo building massive Lego structures
  • LinkedIn: "painter (not houses), sculptor, engineer, inventor, theoretical physicist, mathematician, writer, locksmith, pilot, balloonist, driver, draftsman, interior designer. Available for...well, anything really; I can do a great job for you"
Exhibit D: Caligula
  • Definitely a Twitter candidate. "Senators are fat, lazy dangerous lefties. VOTE THEM OUT!!!!" "German Governor conspiracy! Mainstream media won't report it, of course. Neues Deutschland spokesman for the socialists". "I'm gonna build a wall. A big one. The biggest ever built. To keep the peasants out".
Exhibit E: Henry VIII
  • Facebook page: 1.5 million Protestant followers; 2 Catholics (Holy Roman Emperor Charles V and his mum)
  • Twitter: "Be afraid, be very afraid, Charley boy"
  • Tinder: "looking for a wife. Short term temporary post"
Exhibit F: Mao Zedong
  • TikTok: pictures of a Long March
  • WeChat group with Qin Shi Huang, Kublai Khan and Sun Yat-sen
  • Facebook page sponsored by HuaWei
  • Twitter: "We're gonna build a wall around Taiwan. A big wall. The biggest ever. To keep the Taiwanese virus out."
So, 100 blog posts! When Geoffrey Boycott reached a century, he took a fresh guard ready for the next 100. So that's what I'll do.

Thursday, 17 September 2020

Weekly quiz #2

Readers will now that my blog post of a week ago "TLDR and Mr Shakespeare" contained a Shakespearean quiz. Yesterday I published a post with the answers. I thought I might do a weekly quiz for those who enjoy such things.

Today's quiz is a picture one. I'm hoping readers will not cheat but, for those who are OK with cheating and just want to win, (1) there is no prize for winning and (2) here is how to win. Spoiler alert! Right click on the image in Google Chrome and select "search Google for an image". There you go.

Am I trying to beat Google at their game? Maybe. Anyway, this quiz is: Arts and Science (no footballers).

Exhibit A (I'll start with an easy one):

Exhibit B:
Exhibit C:
Exhibit D (a bit harder):
Exhibit E:

Exhibit F:

Exhibit G (suddenly it gets much harder):

Exhibit H:
Comment to answer. Enjoy!

Wednesday, 16 September 2020

Quiz answers

Answers to the Shakespearean TLDR quiz:

  • Some hooligans run away and end up getting their dream weddings - A Midsummer Night's Dream
  • A fully-grown, college-educated man mopes and whines like a child about his home life - Hamlet
  • Identity theft runs rampant in a beach community  - Twelfth Night
  • A wife loses a hankie and also her life - Othello
  • A small boy battles it out with an experienced weasel and nobody wins - King John
  • A bunch of royals get stuck on the most wicked awesome deserted island ever - The Tempest
  • Some shady characters make a whole bunch of outdated law puns; also a woman clearly says no yet in a play full of lawyers no one brings up the issue of consent - Measure for Measure