I wish I could be a ...

...video streamer.

I get immense pleasure out of watching YouTube videos and sometimes catching live Twitch streams.

Regular readers will recall that I play the computer strategy game Civilization VI (O-oh, there go my readers - bye bye. No! Don't go; be patient, this leads to something). Without wishing to be boastful, or inversely falsely modest, I can say I am pretty good at it. I play on the highest difficulty level and beat the game more often than  not. I learned a lot by myself but also a great deal, particularly about optimal plays for higher difficulty levels, by starting to watch streamers playing the game. The best of them are also good at explaining their decision making processes.

I'm also good at explaining myself and so that's what I'd like to do - be a video streamer. I have the technical know-how (or can get it from YouTube and Twitch) to do it.

But I can't.

Why? Because I don't have the charisma that these people have. And because they are closer to the age range of their viewers so can talk the talk, using modern and youthful vernacular. The best of them show genuine interest in their followers in stream chat but more often than not balance that well with progressing their game play. They deal effectively with occasional idiots in Chat. I'm not sure I could do any of that.

Of course, I could take the non-streaming approach of creating edited videos for YouTube. But even those have comments from all and sundry. Would I care about whether those comments were supportive and constructive or downright rude? Do I have the mental strength to take it all in my stride? Well I write blog posts and encourage comments, so I suppose the answer might be Yes.

It isn't just computer games I use YouTube for - I have recently watched Mahler symphonies, modern jazz, Wynton Marsalis playing Haydn - and jazz - and a Bruckner symphony. Also fixing a problem with my Xbox connecting to WiFi. I guess if I wanted to learn about butterflies flapping their wings in the Amazon jungle (that's the real one, not where drones work packing boxes), YouTube would have a video clip for me. What a resource!

I guess it's not a bad idea to have new goals in your life, even at a ripe old age, but I'm not sure becoming a streamer is achievable. Is that sad? Move on, Nigel.