Imelda Marcos

When I played croquet, I used a mallet with a square brass head. As you can see

I use an asymmetric stance with a narrow gap between my feet, through which the mallet swings as I set up the rhythm for my stroke. Sometimes, if my swing is not smooth, the edge of the brass head clips my ankle bone. Which is extremely painful. So I bought a pair of high sided trainers to give protection.

I have a favourite pair of shoes. The most comfortable I have ever had. Leather soles and uppers. Had them for years. The only problem is that they leak in the rain. In those conditions I revert to a pair of suede shoes which are relatively comfortable but, with very hard, wide soles, are not good when driving.

I have another pair of suede shoes. Not only are these extremely smart but they are blue.

 

Because they have long, pointy toes they are very unsuitable for driving. They might get used once a year on average. So why did I buy them? It was a whim; I went into Clark's looking for something comfortable and everyday and came out with the opposite.

What else? Well sandals obviously, for those few days each year when I can wear shorts. I hate sandals and get mocked by some (unnamed) people for wearing socks with them. So I have to buy those horrid "no show" jogging socks. Having said that, it may be that wearing normal socks with sandals may no longer be a 'fashion faux pas' as Mr Wiki claims. glamour.com (obviously bookmarked by cool grandads) tells me that lockdown/quarantine has brought it back into trendy fashion. You wait long enough and your grandad's attire will be voguish, kids!

Also a regular pair of trainers. I like these but they suffer from the disadvantage of taking a considerable time to tie/untie the laces. Particularly time-consuming and awkward when you go into someone's house.

So that's me: six pairs. Not an excessive number, I'd say. Unlike Imelda Marcos who, in 1986 when her husband the Philippine President was ousted in a revolution, was found to have 3,000 pairs. Wikipedia reports that "She and her husband Ferdinand hold the Guinness World Record for the Greatest Robbery of a Government". But not for the most pairs of shoes; that record goes to one Darlene Flynn, an American with16,400 pairs.

I have some way to go to catch up.