Dorgi

My royal correspondent tells me that a dorgi is a cross between a corgi and a daschund. She knows because the Queen has one. thedogdigest.com tells me that reasons for not mixing these two breeds include:

• Requires Significant Amount of Daily Outdoor Exercise. At 94, I have a feeling that Her Maj won't be doing that herself - but I shouldn't be prejudiced by my own attitude to exercise
• Has a Tendency to be Loud. Isn't that true of all dogs? Although to be fair I never heard my friend Tony's pug Lily utter a sound. Maybe they should cross breed corgis with pugs*. Anyway, Her Maj might need to turn down her hearing aid

This is a lockdown dorgi:

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Apparently, if you cross a corgi with a husky, you get a horgi. No, I'm serious!

Crossing an Australian Shepherd with a Poodle gives an AussiePoo. That's what Buzzfeed says. No sniggering!

What do you call a cross between a zebra and a donkey? Easy, it's a zonkey.

A cama is a cross between a camel and a llama.

What amazes me is how these come about. Why do they do this? And who are "they" anyway? Or are animals in the wild just not picky?

*And by the way, a corgi+pug mix is a porgi. Not a porky, and I don't tell those.

Enough.

Quintuple meter

Those of you who, like me, were children of the 60s, will remember Dave Brubeck's Take Five:

Quintuple meter - usually 5/4 or 5/8 time - is surprisingly common in music of all ages.

The First Delphic Hymn, by Athenaeus (2nd century BC) is in the quintuple Cretic meter:

Twenty one centuries later, here's the German baritone Hermann Prey singing Carl Loewe's 1844 ballad Prinz Eugen der edle Ritter in 5/4 time:

Tchaikovsky's Pathetique Symphony (no. 6) also has the main theme of the second movement in 5/4:

I really like this piece of Hindemith - Ludus Tonalis: Fugue in G (1942).It's a jolly 5/8.

I know you youngsters will want something more attuned to your tastes, so here's Taylor Swift in 5/4 mode:

Got a favourite out of these? Let me know.

Seven of...

... Eight. Or Four: music in 7/8 or 7/4 time.

🀍 Here is an example from Igor Stravinsky's The Firebird:

🀖 And the 4th movement of Bartok's Concerto For Orchestra:

🀟 7/8 in jazz: Don Ellis - Beat Me Daddy 7 To The Bar:

🂷 Bulgarian folk music often uses septuple meter, as in this rachenitsa:

It can be either 3-2-2 or 2-2-3. I'll leave you to work out which that is!

🂧 This Misra Capu is a clear 3-2-2:

🃇 Fancy a bit of Doctor Who?

🃗 We can't finish without some Pink Floyd - Money:

I was going to segue to Seven of Nine from Star Trek Voyager but this music proved too interesting. Another day...but here's a little taster!

Can horses laugh?

Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because of its bark.

For Sale - Dead Budgie. Not going cheep.

What do you get if you cross two snakes with a magic spell? Addercadabra and abradacobra.

My friend said he'd shoot me if I didn't stop my flamingo impressions. I had to put my foot down.

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.

How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night? With flood lighting.

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? “Pleased to eat you.”

What do you call 2 octopuses that look exactly the same? Itenticle.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left it.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An Investigator.

Did you hear the one about....

London Grammar

In my continual search for music I don't know, I came across this.

London Grammar are [maybe that should be "is"? Band is definitely a singular entity, but "are" flows better] apparently an electro pop band. I don't know what that is, which isn't surprising for a 77 year old (me not them). I quite like this track; the vocal has a bit of the Joni Mitchell inflexion. Not very electro, I'd say. Less keen on the video, which is a bit weird.

The song is from 2013 but could have been written for lockdown and its effects on young people.

Maybe I'm wasting my young years
Don't you know that it's only fear
I wouldn't worry, you have all your life
I've heard it takes some time to get it right

Oldsters like me need to be less focussed on the effects of lockdown on ourselves. I don't think enough about what it is like to have been a five year old, or a teenager, this last year. Education stalled, social isolation, daily living in a family bubble with no outlet, the prospect of "wasting my young years". I know this isn't what the song is about, but it could be.

Tell me if you like the song. Or click "interesting". Or something else.

Real Bread Week

This will please my son and my co-grandfather, both of whom are bread making devotees. Check out @bakerdanski on Instagram.

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Created and run by the Real Bread Campaign since 2010, #RealBreadWeek is the annual, international celebration of Real Bread and the people behind its rise. [get the pun] This year it runs from 20 to 28 February.

Real bread is apparently additive free and...well that's it, I think.

I should mention that I don't eat bread at home. Too many carbs for my attempts at weight control. Although I will eat the occasional McDonalds burger bun. [Oh no! I've been outed by the Real Breaders! My statue will be torn down]

I have had occasional impulses to bake some bread but they don't last long. That is both the bread - because it's usually tasty - and the impulse. But on the whole I regard any kitchen activity as a distraction from much more important activities such as ... blogging. Cooking and baking - get them over and done with as soon as possible, so that I can return to my sedentary lifestyle.

Not sure why these people need a Week. Why not Real Bread Day, or the International Day of Real Bread? Or Lockdown Real Bread Year. A Week sounds kind of...well, weak. Or greedy. Anyway 20 to 28 February is nine days, isn't it? Can't you count?

So get baking, you bread fanatics, and share the outcomes HERE!